Great ones J!


1. A day without sunshine is like night.
People in Seattle might argue on this.

2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Captain Hook might argue on this.

4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
Cause that 1% is retired.

6. He who laughs last thinks the slowest.
Those who do not laugh at all are the ones that worry me.

12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
This is an old ones where the actual reference was "If you think no one would care if you died, try missing couple of credit card payments"

14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
Same as the speed of light (in reverse).

19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
I'd be 75% scared to death.

25. Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
Reminds me of an old Danny Kaye joke where talking to the audience at a night time show "Please drive home on the sidewalk, all the accidents happen on the road".

~TL